One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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