hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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