Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize