The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
either way he was missing a nipple.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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