He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
This is the high leading the old right now
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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