I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
