I'm really into asian looking animals
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
