Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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