I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
