Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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