i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize