I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
