I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
