How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize