love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
ugly people sure do ruin things
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
