I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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