I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize