Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
