ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I fill condoms, not promises.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
