my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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