Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
