Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize