I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
