Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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