so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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