...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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