do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
