I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
