somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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