Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
