with your own penis?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
