It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
