He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
