i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
