i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
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