I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
