The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
