no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
