three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
