we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
