You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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