Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
