Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
