Don't you send me to vm
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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