No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
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