The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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