How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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