in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize