what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
