I got chris browned last night
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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