she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
